My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
You can't motorboat a personality
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
This is classic penis vs brain.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
