I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Randomize
