6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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