youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
you inspire me to be a worse person
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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