He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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