The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
