a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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