I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
