Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
