why didn't you poke me back
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Sacagawea was the original milf.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Randomize
