and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Is it penis luge time yet?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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