what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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