The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
