I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
should my penis look like a turkey
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
