dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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