Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Randomize
