CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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