her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
