when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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