you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
We need to rekindle our bromance
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I have already put on my inside pants.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
