Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
