that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
