I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
