she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
