Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Randomize
