i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Randomize