I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
