love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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