The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
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