I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
It was a blind-side dick pic.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
