I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
