I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
