I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
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Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
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As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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