pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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