When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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