My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Randomize
