I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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