counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
