in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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