Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
This toilet bowl is my home.
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