Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize