You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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