I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
You ate ashes out of my bong
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
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