either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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