Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize