Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
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