Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
