and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
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We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
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I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize