he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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