This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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