We won't sleep together?
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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