The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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