why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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